April 11, 2010
Tonight a friend asked me if I have any trips planned lately. I was at an event for the nonprofit I work for.
“No,” I said. “I am not planning on going anywhere for a little while. I’m just really happy. I love my house. I love my friends. I love my job. I’m staying put.”
It was great to be able to say that and mean it.
In a few months, the tourists will start to come. Before they get here, it is good to remember that this is just down the road from where I sleep each night:
One way a storm is building.
The other way, there’s this.
But the best of all is this…
I don’t know what my life would be without this.
These are ladies I work with: my boss, my co-worker, and our former intern. Tonight we worked an event together, and I am reminded again how grateful I am to have them close. And to have a job that I believe in and love.
Life isn’t always easy, but God is so, so faithful.
Remember back a few years ago, when I started this blog, and I moved to California, and I didn’t know where this California adventure would lead me or if I would even be able to stay here? Remember? This is why I’m here. And it feels so good to know that.
So, thank you God, for revealing your faithfulness to me this weekend, through the beauty of this place, and the beauty of my friends.
January 1, 2010
Comparatively, I didn’t post much in 2009. Factors including busy-ness, tiredness, and laziness contributed to the lack of writing, but I also just needed a break from posting aspects of my life online. I needed to live them instead of feeling like I was looking through a camera’s eye — a photographer snapping away at life instead of living it.
It has been the best and the hardest year of my life. In cliche blogger fashion, here’s a list of accomplishments and set-backs:
– I lost a very dear friend to the epidemic called breaking up
– After several rigorous interviews, I got my amazing job working with women rescued from prostitution in India. Also, my supervisor and only co-worker at said job is pretty freaking awesome.
– At that job, I have spent the past year learning, learning, learning. I have been humbled and honored to have the position, but it is a lot less glamorous than it sounds. Like any job, there are good days and bad days.
– I left my life in Los Angeles and moved to Orange County — a bittersweet deal.
– For the first nine months in Orange County, I suffered from the strongest sense of culture shock that I’ve ever known.
– I gained an amazing house three blocks from the beach, with the most fantastic roommates I could’ve dreamt of having.
– I traveled to India in April and October.
– I was a bridesmaid in an Indian wedding.
– I visited the Red Light Districts in Mumbai, Kolkata, and Tenali.
– I rode in a rickshaw, ate food so spicy it made my mouth bleed, felt heat so hot I think I melted a little, became part of a family across the world, and saw and understood love in a way I had never experienced it before.
– I witnessed an argument in Telagu between a pimp, a madam, and the leader of one of the social organizations we work with.
– I saw my family in May, August, and December.
– My brother came to visit in May, and we went to an Angels’ game, saw the new Star Trek movie, ate Indian food, went to the beach, and had an all-around good time in between my work and the conference he came to LA to attend.
– Friend K moved away in May. It was very, very sad.
– I went on vacation with L to San Francisco, Jackson Hole, and the middle-of-nowhere Wyoming.
– I started attending a Wednesday-night church and a Monday-night support group with people who are quickly becoming my Orange County family. After meeting weekly with them for three months, I realized I hadn’t felt a grain of anxiety for about that long. I attribute this to their prayers, support, love, and honesty.
– I lived through three of the most busy months of my life and am thankful my friends have been incredibly understanding about how I’ve neglected them.
– I turned 27.
– My car was towed, and I had to spend a lot of time at the DMV. Thankfully, a good friend came with me and read to me out of the book, How to Make Anyone Fall In Love With You.
– I got an amazing tan.
– My very, very dear friend A.S. and her husband and daughter moved to Southern California in November. I can’t tell you what an incredible blessing it is to have their lovely selves close by.
– I went on several very bad dates, some of them hilariously bad. I desperately wish I could blog about them.
– I started dating a lawyer. A lawyer? A LAWYER. I’m so professional, even in my romantic pursuits. His name is C.K., and, no, he is not a fragrance from the ’90s. He took me out for southern food and mini golf on our first date. Just give me sweet potato fries and a giant wooden windmill, and I’m happy as a pup. Oh, yes, and he is a pretty stellar person as well.
– I went to the ER for the first time in my life with a kidney stone. Said kidney stone is still just hanging out in my vital organs.
The year was a blur of change, grief, and beautiful moments of losing who I thought I was and accepting who I really am — the good and the bad, the strong and the weak, the anxious and the hopeful. Though the difficulties were few, their magnitude was overwhelming. I had to re-learn many things and had to reintroduce myself to myself. I think that’s kind of what happens when you break up with someone you’ve been with for a long, long time. You forget who you were when you were alone, and once you’re alone again, you find yourself with a stranger.
But I have learned who that stranger is again, and I’m a better person because of it. At least I think so.
It’s been an incredible year. And an incredible decade, which included the end of high school, college, various jobs, various living situations, various states, deaths, births, and so many incredible people God brought into my life to carry me through the past 10 new years. It has been a joy to know you all and to experience your grace and love.